Here’s the blurb
A respectable septuagenarian steals a valuable painting and later tries to return it, with a little help from her friends.
Bored National Trust volunteer, Maureen, steals an obscure still life as a giant up-yours to all those who’ve discounted her. The novice fine art thief is rumbled by some fellow room guides, but snitches get stitches, camaraderie wins out and instead of grassing her up, they decide to help.
Often written off as an insipid old fart, Maureen has a darker side, challenging ingrained ideas of how senior citizens should behave. Her new set of friends make her feel alive again. No longer quite so invisible, can this unlikely pensioner gang return the now infamous painting without being caught by the Feds?
I wrote this after hearing a radio interview in which an art detective revealed how a stolen Titian was dumped at a bus stop outside Richmond station. In a red, white and blue plastic bag! I just couldn’t shake such a compelling image. I volunteered at Ham House for many years, and my passion for this Jacobean gem, together with the volunteers’ indomitable spirit, gave birth to my unlikely anti-hero.
With over five million members, the National Trust is a huge British institution. Yet, next to nothing has been written about it in terms of contemporary fiction. Until now.
While No Oil Painting explores themes of insignificance and loneliness in older age, particularly for women, it is mainly intended to entertain and offer a small haven in dark, uncertain times.
Purchase Links
UK Kindle: https://www.amazon.co.uk/No-Oil-Painting-Genevieve-Marenghi-ebook/dp/B0FNLWTCBS/
UK Paperback: https://www.amazon.co.uk/No-Oil-Painting-Genevieve-Marenghi/dp/1917224125/
US Kindle: https://www.amazon.com/No-Oil-Painting-Genevieve-Marenghi-ebook/dp/B0FNLWTCBS/
US Paperback: https://www.amazon.com/No-Oil-Painting-Genevieve-Marenghi/dp/1917224125/
My Review
No Oil Painting follows Maureen, a National Trust volunteer, who decides to combat her boredom by plotting the theft of her favourite painting from Ham House, rather than see it go to Scotland on loan to another stately home. Only, once the painting is in her possession does Maureen then realise it must be returned by fair means or foul to prevent her crime being discovered, or someone she knows, being implicated for the theft.
I did find the story a little slow to get going, and there is a lot of backstory for Maureen, which I found a little too in-depth. I was keen to get on with her predicament of first stealing the painting and then returning it. I did enjoy the elements of bickering and general discord between the group of very different individuals, all volunteering at Ham House, and their interactions with the paid staff members.
This wasn’t quite the fun, light-hearted read I expected, as there are darker elements in Maureen’s backstory and the theft of the painting and it’s return, while driving the narrative, are simply the means by which the found friendships are created. An engaging read, all the same. It’s sure to appeal to readers of deeper narratives, with a slower pace.
Meet the author
With a BA in English and Philosophy, Genevieve worked for eleven years at the Weekend FT, where she helped create and launch How To Spend It magazine.
She volunteered for years as a National Trust guide at Ham House. This became the setting for her debut art heist novel, No Oil Painting, which was listed for the inaugural Women’s Prize Trust and Curtis Brown Discoveries, and was published by Burton Mayers Books on 10th October 2025.
Her writing uses dark humour to probe the difference between our perception of people and their true selves. The gulf between what is said and what is meant. She considers people watching an essential skill for any writer; overheard snippets of conversation or a bonkers exchange at a bus stop are like gold nuggets. She’s been known to follow people to catch the end of a juicy conversation or argument. Women aged over fifty are essentially invisible anyhow and she views this as a kind of superpower.
Unlike her protagonist Maureen, she hasn’t used this to commit art theft. Yet.
Giveaway to Win National Trust chocolate, and a Ham House towel and fridge magnet (Open to UK Only)
Win National Trust chocolate, and a Ham House towel and fridge magnet (Open to UK Only)
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